Unfortunately, rape happens in our culture. It is a horrible horrible thing. In the case with Regina, we were supposed to hate her. So her treatment and manipulation of Graham made us despise her.
Then go ask Adam what was going on with Regina and Graham. Regina is never brought to bear for her crimes against Graham. it’s never brought up, she is never punished for her 28 year long rape. And if you were to ask Adam (as many fans did back in s2) why that was…it’s because “it wasn’t rape because canonically you don’t know what they were doing during those ‘town meetings.” According to Adam, they could have been playing Scrabble so Regina has nothing to pay for.
And that–THAT–is maybe the best, very best, example of what I’m trying to get it: not understanding that this problem because they don’t recognize the problem in the first place.