Why I might be giving up on Once in S4: Being denied our happily ever after

[Crystal Princess]

Here’s a link to a Tumblr post I made which explains much of it:

https://www.tumblr.com/crystallineprincess/92098657475/adaaaam

But basically… recently after hearing about certain developments with W13, I had a genuine breakdown for a few days and somewhat of an epiphany. Basically I realised that I’ve spent years investing emotionally in things that don’t leave a place for people like me in their worlds. It’s a really really horribly lonely and crappy thought and one people rarely think to try to empathise with when they judge the zeal of queer shippers or those who jump on queer subtext – more often than not, it’s all we get. Giving us crumbs and then judging us for picking them up…

I loved OUAT, I really did. At least for the first two seasons. But when a show goes on for more than three seasons, has such a huge variety of characters and such a large queer fanbase, what they’re doing is really not acceptable. Queer people are not something you can just throw on the backburner and I’m sick of waiting around for representation and playing Mother May I with the showrunners, our wonderful straight gatekeepers. I see no indication from the showrunners that they give a crap about the queer fanbase whatsoever. And that hurts.

Recently I started watching Lost Girl. I put it off because it has one very problematic episode – Caged Fae, which contains a depiction of what could easily be interpreted as transphobic violence. I have been attacked for being trans before, and from descriptions, yes this would be triggering. But then you have the influence of straight, and cis gay people telling us we’re oversensitive, to suck it up. There was an apology issued, at least – but there are still to my knowledge no trans characters on the show, again a show with quite a large base of characters that’s been going on for some time now, that prides itself on diversity. It still hurts.

But one thing I do notice watching the show is that even if they did mess up – I can still tell they care. Shows that feature large amounts of diversity are often accused of forcing it, but watching Lost Girl I get precisely the opposite impression – while it’s a little cheesy at times, it feels natural that they’re showing people of different ethnicities and sexualities as if it was normal. You start to realise it’s stuff like OUAT that feels like it’s put in a glossy family friendly package and is like that friend at parties that tries to avoid you while hoping you don’t notice and bullcrapping you afterwards even when all your friends confirm your suspicions. This is exactly the feeling Adam, Eddy and the rest give me.

Trans ball drop aside, I don’t get this feeling like I don’t belong there when I’m watching Lost Girl, or Orphan Black and definitely not Orange is the New Black. And that is absolutely huge. It’s a rotten feeling that basically means you enjoy fictional media, a cornerstone of human society, that bit less. Telling people to just suck that up is defending inequality – and it’s wrong, full stop. I don’t want to commit emotionally to a story like OUAT that’s about love and “Modern” takes on fairy tales that refuses to show a person like me – and even then I’m only talking about one aspect of myself, my sexuality, not my gender identity(as at least I can identify with a cis female – non binary peeps have it harder in that regard).

I feel like when Queer people choose to drop a series because of disappointment, we are chastised. But we have a right to be choosy. We’ve been excluded from and largely mocked by mainstream media for so long. We’re treated so badly, we have a right to complain and a right to choose. I shouldn’t be guilted into “giving the show a chance” or “watching for the wrong reasons”. There are so few shows out there that I’m both interested in and feature decent queer characters, but I’m still going to prioritise those over ones that could care less.

I want people to understand that OUAT as an entity is not friendly towards queer people – or hell even people of colour. It is in very problematic territory and we have a right to be upset without being shouted down by people who don’t understand what it’s like to be told you don’t get a happy ending. They’ve made no commitment to showing queer characters and queer relationships on a show that has well over 100 speaking roles at this stage. Queer people exist, we are not that tiny a minority and we deserve to be seen.

With the news that Elsa, a queer icon in many ways, is not going to have any relationship focus I see only a missed opportunity, not something more progressive. It was the one thing that might have convinced me the Frozen lark wasn’t a money grab. Ouat benefits from and profits off it’s large queer fanbase, and when the opportunity came to make a very meaningful gesture towards the Queer community, they dropped the ball. It would not surprise me if OUAT made it to 6 seasons without a single queer relationship having any focus, or addressing the race issue at all.

And that’s messed up in this day and age. Everything with a large cast should have at least one – or several in this case – queer characters. Because otherwise it’s not reflective of the people watching it. If it was an isolated incident it’d be one thing – but it’s not. We’re still under-represented in shows like this. And I’m tired, mad and depressed over it. When my own love life sucks(and it pretty much always does) i want to be able to throw myself at cute cartoon movies and fantasy romance dramas like straight people can for their perk me ups. But I can’t. Because they’re not there, and we’re told we’re wrong for being upset about that.

[Crystal Princess]

working?

I don't cause commotions, I am one.

[Author]

Posts