ONCE - Once Upon a Time podcast
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Home › Forums › Wonderland › Episode discussion › 1×09 “Nothing to Fear” › Should Jafar give up on his dad?
Because all children want their parents love.
Yes and even though most of the parents on Once are bad, it’s something all the characters we love want. It doesn’t always make sense because they’ve been abused or a different reason but they pass it on to their kids but the kids want love from their parents.
The fact that a parent–someone you know is supposed to love you and protect you and care for you–doesn’t is traumatizing. And it’s not a matter of “well they are just a bad parent.” It doesn’t work that way inside a child’s head; the reason they don’t love you is YOUR fault. That’s how abandonment works. They don’t love you/left you because you weren’t good enough, because there is something inherently wrong with you, your very self. And suddenly your mission in life is to prove to that parent that you are worthy of love, despite the logic that a child should never have to *earn* the love of a parent. But that’s Jafar’s psychology. I think inside his head he thinks that if he can just prove to his father how powerful he is, how strong and wise, then the Sultan will love him. Remember back when he was a little boy? How he spoke up at the advising meeting when Mirzah failed? He wasn’t trying to usurp Mirzah’s position (he never even looked at Mirzah) but was trying to earn some approval–“look how clever I am. Please love me.”
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